Safety and Security

Taxis / Cars / Motorbikes / Tuk Tuks / Rickshaws / Pushbikes

Or in summary – wheeled transportation.

Taxis

Whenever I have got in a taxi overseas, if there is only the driver and I in the cab I always sit in the front. To me sitting in the back by yourself with a driver makes it look like you might be a diplomat, politician, royalty, rich, famous whatever. It’s just a bit too snobbish and almost colonial to me, “I say driver, do drive on there’s a good chap.” But also if I don’t like the way things are going and want to get out I’d have no hesitation at pulling the handbrake on at the right time and making a run for it. Sitting in the front makes me feel more in control and thus more comfortable.

I’ve had great experiences with taxi drivers when hiring them for the day in:

– Phuket, a full day and as much of the island as we could take in with all his stories of the 2004 tsunami;

– Kuala Lumpur, when going out to the elephant sanctuary which was 200km away and stopping in multiple villages and sights along the way and hearing all his life and family stories;

– Bali, when taking me out to a cliff top temple and the same again, listening to his stories of his life growing up in Bali.

I’ve also had less pleasant experiences with taxi drivers but we’ll stick to the positives.

Tip: if there isn’t a meter agree the price upfront. Know whether it’s a haggling location or not. Trust your instinct(s). If you don’t like the look / feel of the driver, don’t get in.

Hire Cars

If you’re going to hire a car unless you are a motor mechanic you aren’t necessarily going to be able to spot one in good mechanical condition. If you rent from a ramshackle lean-to [which I’ve done multiple times] you’re taking a chance. I’ve never had a mechanical problem when hiring from a non-mainstream place [Hertz, Avis etc]. In Crete, unlike most places where you pick up the car full and return it full, I hired a mini moke from a back street bloke and the tank was empty. He didn’t care if you brought it back empty. But you had no idea how much fuel you were going to use and the punters always had fuel leftover which they were not reimbursed for. He siphoned it out of his ‘for hire’ mini mokes and put it in his own car. Smart bloke! #winner.

Make sure you inspect the car thoroughly and note every dent and scratch. Someone, somewhere is going to try and find a new dent / scratch they you are [supposedly] responsible for so they can keep your deposit.

Two Wheels

If you are going to hire a motorcycle or scooter, make sure you’ve ridden one before and know what you are doing. If you’re taking a pillion make sure they know how to pillion properly. I was behind a bike in Thailand and as they leaned into the corner, the pillion passenger panicked [first time on a bike] tried to lean the opposite way thinking they were steadying the back and stopping it from going down. Going round the corner the rider and the bike were fighting the pillion passenger. Inevitably they didn’t make the corner and it brought them off. As they were both in standard Thailand attire of shorts, flip flops and t-shirts they had major gravel rash which was an ambulance job and off to hospital. Ruined their holiday, cost them a shedload of money for the damage to the bike and medical expenses. All through inexperience, not asking the question(s) upfront and giving one simple sentence of advice “just lean with the bike.”

I know some scooters aren’t much more powerful than hairdryers on wheels but I’ve been on some that have a surprising amount of pick up. Know your limitations for handling a bike.

If you come from somewhere where crash helmets are mandatory then I know it may seem really ‘Easy Rider’ to ride along with the wind in your hair, the sun on your face, the bugs in your eyes and the grit in your teeth but – and once again – trust me on this one, wear a skid lid. If you go face first into the gravel [I haven’t forgotten that years later] you won’t enjoy it. You’ll lose skin, likely some teeth and depending on your speed could beak bones in your face resulting in permanent injury. Something you can little afford to do if you’re already as ugly as me! I don’t care how uncool it looks, wear a crash helmet.

Tuk Tuks

Don’t fall out or off, just sit down. It isn’t the Fast and the Furious. Wherever you’re going, you’ll be there soon enough. Just arrive in one piece or you’ll screw up your day / night / holiday – whatever you’re on.

Rickshaws

First experience of these was in the Far East in 1983.We had rickshaw races around Penang and to be quite honest, I’m surprised the drivers lived the night.

Also had rickshaw races through Singapore with my daughter in 2013 and through Amsterdam with my wife in 2014. Rickshaw drivers must be as fit as!

These folks put in a huge amount of effort to haul folks around their cities, it can’t be physically easy. No matter what they charge, they’ve earned plus everything you give them as a tip. Don’t ever do a runner from a rickshaw driver after all the effort they’ve put in for you.

Pushbikes

Like a motorbike / scooter, just make sure you know what you’re doing. Know what the road rules are for bikes, ie you also have to stop for red lights and the road rules also apply to you. Wear a skid lid, it could save your life.

Drinking and Driving / Riding

Most countries have outlawed drinking and driving / riding. If you drink and drive / ride anywhere in the world, then you’re a tool. You’re endangering your own life and safety, the lives of any passengers you may have and any and everyone else on the road. I’m not going to preach, I’ve made my point.

Read about the expatriate in Saudi Arabia who get pissed and crashed his car into the head of Saudi police traffic division.

Road Rules

Know them. In many countries on a roundabout, if you are actually going round then traffic entering has to give way to you. In Kazakhstan [for example] if you are on the roundabout, you have to give way to traffic entering the roundabout. Bizarre but it is the way it is.

If you drive on the left at home and are driving in a country where they drive on the right, remember at a junction to look the other way first and last. An American woman killed a young man in England by looking the wrong way [and was then promptly spirited away by the yanks to avoid facing justice].

When my wife first arrived in Australia, when crossing the road she looked the wrong way, the way she was used to looking – and seeing it was clear she stepped out. Only she hadn’t looked in the correct direction and almost got cleaned up by a car.

Some places, if you are in an accident then it is going to be your fault. The logic is: if you weren’t driving in our country, then this accident wouldn’t have happened. Seriously, I’ve had to deal with this more times than I care to recall.

Weather

Ride / drive to the weather conditions. If you come from the tropics and have never seen and/or driven in snow and ice then it’s very different.

If you come from a country where it hardly ever rains and you’re driving in the rain then there are going to be some serious differences to multiple aspects of driving and your first rain storm at night, is not the time and place to start learning.

Road Conditions

Are you used to being transported on perfect tarmac so flat you could play snooker on there? Well lucky you. A lot of the world ain’t like that. There could be pot holes easily big enough to bring you off a bike. If it’s dark and there’s no streetlights, no cats eyes and your headlights are crap then you’re in for a long and slow trip.

In Australia we have long stretches of road with no streetlights or cats eyes. If it’s dark and raining, the surface of the road becomes very shiny and it is very difficult to see the road marking – if there are any at all. I have had to stop and pull over more than once due to inability to see the road.

Drive to the road conditions, the same as you should the weather conditions.

International Licence

If you’re going to drive internationally find out what licences your destination country(s) recognise. I was riding a bike in Hua Hin, Thailand and got stopped by the traffic cops. I showed them my International Licence – nope; my Australia licence – nope; my UK licence – nope. Apparently none were valid. This isn’t true my International licence was valid there. I asked what my options where and it was:

1) Accompany us to the police station, which would have been an all day event, held in a non-airconditioned cell with no khazi, alongside multiple nefarious lunatics in for a variety of offences talking bollocks to a multitude of people whilst they tried to outwait me;

2) Pay an ‘on the spot’ fine, cash of course with no receipt available, to the two coppers.

I took option 2. At least they smiled and bowed as they ripped me off and even waved as they rode off. I think it cost me ThB200 each which was about $16 all up or in Hua Hin terms – 1 round of Singha beers