Whilst in KL we were staying in a rooftop penthouse owned by my mate Lee. We were in his local pub and a mate of his came in [another English expat] who lived in Melaka. He ran ‘Sid’s Bar’ on the river and invited us down to Melaka for a couple of days. Many people who come to Malaysia spend their time in KL or Penang but miss out on a really lively and interesting little town which is only a couple of hours away down the west coast. Melaka is one of the country’s most historic towns and has a great combination of lively streets, old colonial buildings, curiosity shops and eccentric eateries.
We borrowed Lee’s car [cheers mate] and hauled ass down to Melaka. We reached the first toll booths on the motorway / freeway / highway [whatever they call it] and Lee had forgotten to tell us we needed a card, I didn’t have one. I had to leave the car at the barrier, which really impressed all the drivers behind me, run across to another toll booth, buy a card and then cheat death again to get back to my lane and then cheat death again by not having 10 angry drivers behind me, kill me. You need a card – get one!
The drive to Melaka was easy, straight down the motorway. I stopped to fill up with petrol but the pump wouldn’t start. I went into the shop to ask and the attendant asked how much I was going to put in? I didn’t know I just said I’d fill up. They asked how much it would cost to full my tank, I had no clue cos I didn’t know how much the tank held. Turns out you have to pre-pay [they could have just said that]. I put $25 down and collected what I didn’t use afterwards. It’s simple but was made unnecessarily difficult.
It took us a couple of hours to get there, finding Sid’s bar and the hotel across the road was easy. We were on the top floor of the hotel, there was no lift only stairs and I hadn’t banked on dragging two suitcases up 3 flights of stairs. That was not easy. The room was ‘basic’, I don’t care but the Long-Haired Admiral is not good at doing ‘basic’.
Once we had arrived and checked in the first thing we did was adjourn to Sid’s for a beer. We got table on the veranda by the river under the gaze of centuries old cannons in the remnants of a fort across the river.
It’s been a few years since I’ve faced off against large calibre Naval guns like that!
Riverside was a prime location and the service was fast, efficient and friendly, that could have been because we knew the owner of course. Nice to watch the tourist riverboats chug by and the two huge iguanas or monitor lizards [or whatever they were] have a scrap for whatever bits of leftover food were floating by. We didn’t try the food served by the pub so have no idea what it was like. Most Malaysian bars are aimed at tourists and expats, as there aren’t any real ale pubs (or real ales) and it’s not cheap.
MELAKA TOWN
Melaka used to be called Malacca which is Greek for ‘wanker’. They changed the name but only for the town. The Malacca strait between Indonesia and the Malay peninsula is still insulting Greeks every day. It’s an interesting place and a UNESCO world heritage site with a long and rich history of traders who have plied these waters for centuries have made it a real melting pot of multicultural influences, and successfully too. In addition to the native Malaysians, there’s been Indian, Portuguese, Britons, Dutch, Middle Easterners, Japanese and Chinese all of whom who have passed through here at one time or another leaving their marks with heritage buildings, forts, ancient landmarks and a mix of various old colonial structures. Melaka is a kaleidoscope of cultural experiences all contained in one little corner of Malaysia
JONKER ST
This is the main drag through Chinatown – you can’t miss it. Everything happens her, certainly once the sun goes down.
The centre of Melaka is a fairly small area and can be explored relatively easily on foot over a couple of days. Running off the main drag are endless little alleys and unique old streets with cafes and bars where you can get authentic Melaka snacks and with quaint shops selling vintage artifacts and ornaments. The only thing I did find disturbing in the shops was the original shoes for Chinese bound feet. They were the size you would put on a 2 or 3 year old. I couldn’t find it in myself to take photos of those.
On Friday and Saturday nights [whilst we were there] the street is closed to traffic from 6pm – midnight to become a huge street food scene and access is only for pedestrians and outrageously decorated and highly colourful rickshaws with loud boom boom music about 800 decibels like a mobile 1970’s disco! The whole place takes on a bit of a party atmosphere which is a lot of fun.
Our outrageously decorated trishaw whose DJ / pilot pumped out a remix of techno hip-hop that not many 1990’s raves would have heard of!
No matter what your taste and budget in food, you’ll find it and you’ll be able to afford it. There is no shortage of Chinese and Indian [my favourite] stalls which cost nothing more than a fistful of ringgit (sorry Clint).
Apparently Jonker St is also good for shopping. I know nothing about shopping except when the credit cards get a hammering. Which they did. Enough said.
QUIET MELAKA
If you want some quiet time to mellow out away from the mayhem of Jonker Street, then a river cruise or a walk by the river is ideal for viewing all the street artwork and murals on the houses and buildings.
The river walks are clean, [relatively] well maintained and stretch for quite a way around the town. There are plenty of places to stop for a coffee or a cool refreshing beer.
Lunch by the river, enjoying the tranquillity of solitude, there is no shortage of places to stop, relax and take in the ambience.
NAVAL & MARITIME MUSEUM
Being an ex-seafaring type, I can never walk past a maritime museum especially if there old gunboats out front.
The main part of the museum is centred around a life size model of a Portuguese ship Flor De La Mar [Sea Flower] which sank off Melaka sometime in the 15th century.
The maritime museum provides a good insight into the history of the Far East as a busy sea trading port. Melaka is only a few hundred miles north of Singapore which then opens out into the South China Sea, the Java Sea and the routes to Australia and beyond. This is one of the reasons why Melaka then lost out to Singapore to become the regions main trading hub and port, simply because it wasn’t at the crossroads of multiple seaways. That is a double-edged sword because although Singapore has become a global hub of commerce and one of the worlds major international airports, Melaka has retained its quaint old world charm which Singapore has lost. It depends what you like and what you want.
You don’t have to be a naval historian to find this interesting.
Christ Church is the oldest functioning church in Malaysia, t was built in the 1700’s to celebrate 100 years of Dutch rule. When it was first built in was painted white but re-painted red in 1911 and has stayed that way since. Of everyone I asked why they chose red for a church, no one could tell me why. It remains one of life’s mysteries. It isn’t difficult to find because 1) it’s in the centre of town and 2) as well as Dutch Square, it’s also called Red Square. It’s the second Red Square I’ve been to, the other one has the Kremlin in one corner. If you’ve been to Holland you can tell these are very Dutch architect inspired buildings.
St Francis Xavier Church
This church was originally painted white and managed to stay painted white. Unlike Christ Church.
The final word on the town was given to us by the owner of a little waterfront bar. She said “we here consider Melaka, with all it’s beauty, splendour and colours – ‘The Peacock of Malaysian cities’!”